Another couple of weeks have passed and i feel like i have leterally not stopped.Had another appointment at southampton and was more of a catch up than anything else. He did sort out the vit d but that swas about it. Lung fuction lower than last time but i actually think things have been more stable well only one admission in 2 months which is a record for me.
Still coughing up blood which is annoying and seems to happen at the most inconvenience time, usually at work and then have to explain myself and ask for help. Thankfullt usually one of my closest friends are usually there to help mepick up the pieces however one day it all got to much and happened in a public place i ended up in tears and felt like i could not carry on anyway it was fine cleaned up and sorted and as usual you carry on. The eating is still a problem and am mostly put of eating now, fab for weight loss but not so good for energy levels which are non existant.
I also seem to be in constant pain and taking painkillers like they are going out of fashion!!
I have never been so tired as i am now but i just never sleep which is driving me slightly insane.
Things seem to get harder to cope with every day but some how you carry on i guess which i do and whilst i am determined to  get on with life i have to admit i would like a little break from the constan demands that i feel are on me at the moment. If its not running around at work it is running around at home.
I thought i was going to end up in my second home last week as peak flows were down to 100 and sats 78 but thankfully nebs picked me up, i think the weather changing didnt help and chest just thought had enough, also was trying to push myself to hard i think thankfully i have a wonderful best friends who made me see sense and eventually i gave in a had a rest, its funny but the more ill i feel the more i want to do stuf but when im fine i cant be arsed to do anything.
A so for work well it is so busy at the moment and i have a to do list as long as my arm, if i didnt love my job so much and if i wasnt so bloody stubborn i think i would think about leaving as i just cant keep up with it all anymore. I have the most amazing manager who is so supportive and seems to generally care about me etc and also have the most amazing collegues who help me out loads and also give me the kick up the arse i need when im not quite acting sensibly.
I really need to thank my bestest friend she has been my rock recently and whilst i say thankyou all the time i am not sure she really knows how much i appreciate her!!
I have become a little obsesses with my gnomes that i rescued, they were in a right mess but over time they are definetly looking fab, well at least it gives me something to do that is nice and relaxing, just wish i had more time to do it.

Well that was a load of waffle but who cares it got it of my chest i guess. Now to get on with my to do list i guess before work tomorow and for the whole week, may be i need a holiday!!!