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Sunday 30 September 2012

Sunday again!!!

Well Sunday is here again and thankfully I feel a hundred times better than last week! It seems I was given the wrong drugs which I'm known to be allergic to, so no wonder I felt terrible! Now I am on the right antibiotics and I think they are doing the trick. This week is a busy week as I have to go to Kent tomorrow and then Birmingham on Thursday and work in between! I have decided that today I'm not doing anything more than sitting on sofa with smugly as its to cold!! Oh well nothing else exciting to say.
Xx

Wednesday 26 September 2012

living or just existing

The title of this blog says it all, i am feeling so rubbish at the moment and i don't seem to be able to do anything without being utterly exhausted. Im tired, in pain and have no energy.
I know i should be more positive and you don't have to tell me that there are people out there worse of me and whilst i know, it doesn't help very much with the way i feel at the moment. I wish i could put life on hold for a couple of weeks and not move from my bed!!

I have had this week of work and done nothing but still feel terrible, i know i have an infection but it needs to bugger of and quickly, I know this is just a blip and things will sort themselves as they have done before i am just not very patient. I am due back to work tomorrow but deap down know i should take the rest of the week as i am not well enough to go back, i guess i have allways put on such a front to everyone that it is harder to now say when i cant cope!!.

I have decided that if i dont feel better by tomorrow night then i will let the hospital win and i will go in as i am exhausted which isnt helping my lungs.

I managed to walk to kates earlier which is the furthest so far this week but when i got home i felt really poorly.
I have just finished watching a  programme about funerals and it was good, very inspirational!!

Oh well best try and get some sleep!!

Monday 24 September 2012

New week!

Once again last night was another sleepless night, so this morning i decided back to doctors.
I was lucky i got to see the nurse that i usually see about chest so i managed to get a few things sorted.
She gave me some piriton for this bloody rash and said it could be related to the bugs that grew in my lungs a few weeks ago. She didnt think it was viral, she said it could be bacterial. She also listened to me moan on about how yuck i feel and how my pain is not controlled.
It was decided that more antibiotics are needed and also some other bits and pieces to make me feel better.
As for the pain we discussed some options but i decided that i would try regular oramoph and i am not working for the first half of the week so i didnt need to worry about being sleepy.   She told me not to drive as a mixture of the different drugs could mean i would be very sleepy. I am absolutely exhausted so i think some sofa surfing in pjs is going to be necessary for a few days. I know when i am unwell my body tends to need to sleep to get repair itself so i think that is what it wants to do.

I am supposed to be back to work in thursday but i think i might be having the whole week of now, i dont really mind as i know i need to do nothing for a week and going back to soon will just make things worse again. I will see what happens i think.

Smugly is being very soppy today and seems to want to curl up on sofa with me which is quite nice but it probably means later he will drive me mad. 

Oh well not alot else to say for now, i think a little nap is in order.


Sunday 23 September 2012

Busy, busy week!

Well what a busy week, and it is suddenly catching up on me!
I worked three nights last week, which gave me a good oportunity to catch up a lot which is good, I'm knackered now but thankfully I have the first part of the week of as holiday.
I am going back to the doctors tomorrow as I still have this horrible itchy rash and I feel lousy, I didn't sleep at all last night even though I took a bucket load of oramoph and antihistamines. Today I have not managed to do anything which is nice but I do feel lazy.
Fingers crossed the doctors tomorrow can come up with a plan, I'm sure it will include antibiotics which is fine as I feel I need something to help me feel better.
At the moment I feel like I need a whole week of doing nothing so I may just do that in the hope I feel better and have more energy.

Oh well I think I am to tired to type anything sensible so I will update this more tomorrow.




Sunday 16 September 2012

changes!!!

I have decided that this blog is becoming far to whingy with less and and less positive stuff in it. This was always supposed to be my journey about how i live my life and for me to have something to look back on to see how things have changed.
I have decided that this blog will continue to be my fight with living with brittle asthma and emphysema and how i cope with it day to day. I am going to start updating this from this point of view on a weekly basis.
I am also going to include a separate post about life in general as the two run hand in hand. I am going to start a new blog for my working life as i have a very interesting job and no one knows much about it.

Health wise things are not to bad, from tomorrow i am down to 18mg of pred which is fab as i am desperate to get the dose down to something as low as possible, i know it is unlikely to ever be stopped but there is allways some hope.

I am going to list my drugs just so that i have a record of them and then i can look back and see any changes over time.



ADCAL-D3 Chewable tablets TWO TABLETS DAILY
CICLESONIDE CFC-FREE INHALER 160mcg TWO PUFFS TWICE A DAY
CODEINE PHOSPHATE 30mg TABLETS TWO TABLETS FOUR TIMES A DAY AS REQUIRED
CITALOPRAM 10mg TABLETS 1 DAILY
DOXYCYCLINE HYCLATE 100mg TABLETS 1 TWICE A DAY
OMEPRAZOLE 40mg TABLETS 1 DAILY
FEXOFENADINE 180MG TABLETS 1 DAILY
IPRATROPIUM BROMIDE NEBULISER SOLUTION 500mcg/2ml ONE NEBULE 4-6 HOURLY
                                                                                                                WHEN NEEDED
NASONEX NASAL SPRAY 50mcg/dose TWO DOSES IN EACH NOSTRIL DAILY
PREDNISOLONE EC TABLETS 5mg and 1mg 18mg daily
RANITIDINE TABLETS 300mg 1 DAILY
SALBUTAMOL NEBULISER SOLUTION 5mg/2.5ml ONE NEBULE EVERY 4-6 HOURS WHEN
                                                                                         NEEDED
SALAMOL EASI-BREATH CFC INHALER 100mcg/puff 2 PUFFS AS REQUIRED
SERETIDE 250 EVOHALER 2 PUFFS TWICE A DAY
SINGULAIR 10mg TABLETS 1 DAILY
SUCRAFLATE 1g TABLETS 2 tablets 2 TABLETS TWICE A DAY
TIOTROPIUM SOLUTION FOR INHALATION 2.5mcg/puff 2 puffs daily
UNIPHYLLIN CONTINUS MR/TABLETS 200mg 2 TABLETS TWICE A DAY
DOMPERIDONE 10mg TABLETS          1 THREE TIMES A DAY
FERROUS FUMERATE 325mg TABLETS 1 THREE TIMES A DAY


 OTHER ANTIBIOTICS AS NEEDED AND ORAMOPH AS NEEDED


Symptom wise today i have o2 sats of 93%, peak flow 300 which is good for me.

I still have an irritating rash which aparently is viral. I was started on clarythromyacin last week as my sputum sample showed staph. I have finished them now and back to doxyclyclin so we will see if the rash improves.

All in health wise things are not to bad so i would like them to stay like that for a while as i have  a busy few weeks ahead!!


In normal life this week a year ago i was at strictly come dancing and it brought back some wonderful memories from when i was lucky enough to attend with Kate. It really was one of the best nights of my life. When i think back to how ill i was last year i think things have definetly improved so i think i should look at that as quite positive.
It was grandads birthday last week, he was 86 and as much as he drives me mad i love him very much and would be lost without him. We didnt so much for his birthday this year as we have all been so busy. I dont think he minded and i have promised we will make it up to him.

My grandad!!


This week i we had some upset over smugly, i thought at one point i could not take anymore of the arguments about him. I love him to bits and cant bare to part with him, even if he is naughty at times.






I have changed quite a bit since he moved in, i think i am now very soft!!! oh well i think it is for the better.


Oh well i think that is enough of an update for now.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Sunday 9 September 2012

Friends

I really do have the loveliest friends in the world who I rely on far to much. Everyone knows Kate is my rock and does more than I can ever thank her for. I have many other friends who I mustn't forget as they are just as fab. I wish I could do something to thank them but I'm not sure what.
During this week I have been so tired and on Thursday I ended up in tears where I was so overwhelmed, luckily Kate stepped in with some advice and a nice hug and made me realise things weren't that bad I just need sleep!!

This time last year I was at strictly come dancing and it was the best night of my life, I had such a fab time and will never forget it, I was thinking how things had changed since then and I guess in a way things are a bit better or maybe I have just got used to the way things are.

Memories are a fabulous thing and I have many that I treasure!!

Magic wand needed!!!

I am having a blogging session as I have so much on my mind! One thing that is bugging me at the moment is my diet, I try so hard and still don't loose weight, this time last year I was a stone lighter and now I feel like I am back where I started, I know the drugs i m don't help and the fact that exercise is getting harder and harder but I really want and need to lose some weight and just don't know what else to do. I know everyone wants a magic wand but I really need something. I keep thinking if I could just get of steroids it would help but that seems unlikely as as I have been on them for years and years! Oh well not much point whining about it as that ain't going to help!!

Do the drugs work???

I am Updating this after one of those nights where I just couldn't sleep and I don't know why.
I Started some different antibiotics on Friday and it seems they interact with another drug I take so I have been feeling really sick and quite agitated which is not a nice feeling! Hopefully now I have stopped one it will pass quickly! I seem to be taking more and more drugs and I question whether any of them do much!

Morning drugs

Seretide inhaler
Circlesonide inhaler
Tiotropium inhaler
Theophylline
Pred
Fexofenadine
Citalopram
Adcal
Esomepraxole
Domperidone
Sucraflate
Doxycycline
Ferrous fumerate

Lunch time drugs
Ferrous fumerate
Domperidone


Night time
Circlesonide inhaler
Seretide inhaler
Theophylline
Sucraflate
Domperidone
Ferrous fumerate
Doxycycline
Ranitidine
Motelukast

And that doesn't include nebulisers, rescue inhalers and pain killers!

I have to wonder what half of them do but I guess we leave it in the hands of our medical teams and trust them that they do work!!






Thursday 6 September 2012

going round in circles!!

Another day full of rubbish! I know have so much on my to do list I don't know where to start, not helped by the fact I am so bloody tired I can hardly keep my eyes open.
I seem to be going round and round in circles with some things and no answers at the end of it.
I am definetly not happy at the moment with anything and I'm not sure why., I am lucky I have people around me that I care but I don't seem to be able to let them in at the moment and help me.
All I want to do is run away and hide at the moment which is not possible so I am going to have to get on with it.
Oh well I think I need to go and try and do something productive before I collapse on the sofa.

Monday 3 September 2012

ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!

not having a good few days. Part of me wants to scream, another cry and part of me wants to run away. Neither of these will change anything but maybe it would make me feel better.

I feel utterly used at the moment in lots of parts of my life, i have always been the caring type but think some people just take advantage of that and in the end they take the piss. It doesn't matter who is doing this, it is my own fault as i have let them do it and now i am not sure what to do about it now. I will always help anyone and i ask for nothing in return but sometimes i wouldn't mind if people could just consider my feelings. 

I am exhausted beyond relief, my body just doesn't like doing much but my brain wants me to.
I am also in a lot of pain and it seems that i have lost control of it and now its harder to gain again. I feel myself heading for an admission as my lungs hate me, i don't have time at the moment so they are going to have drag themselves out of there strops, and respond to the drugs quicker.

I have just started catching up on some jobs i have been working on for ages, as usual a load more turn up and need doing. I am trying so hard to keep on top of things but there always seems to be something more important to do. I need to try and get into work early on a couple of morning this week so i can get some things done, its convincing my body that it wants to get up early that is the problem.

Oh well i think i need an early night so i am of to land of nod!!

Night Night