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Thursday 17 June 2010

future!!

I have decided enough of being miserable and things are only going to change if i try and change them. I am going make a list of that i want or need to do in the future:

1. Try and get some better control of my health, firstly get my RBH appointment brought forward, they are the only people that can really help and if they cant do anymore then atleast i can say that i tried.

2. Start thinking about number 1, i cant please everyone else all the time so i am going to stop trying, if people are my real friends they will stand by me no matter what.  For a little while i am going to concentrate on myself and getting what i want or need out of life.

3. Decide what to do with my job, whether i reduce my hours or change completely i am not sure, all i do know is that i can no longer work full time and have any kind of life, maybe i could just reduce my hours for a couple of months and see what happens.

4.start the OU course that i have been wanting to do for ages but keep putting of.

Well thats a start but most importantly live every day as if there was no tomorrow!!

FEELING DOWN POST HOLIDAY

Well just returned from a fabulous holuday to turkey, really needed the rest as was really tired before i left!!
the holiday was great, laid on the beach all day!! as for my health it was relatively ok over there, had a few dodgy moments but nothing  i couldnt deal with.
no back in england and things couldnt be more different. As soon as i landed my lungs turned against me and they dont seem to want me to have a life at all!!
I guess i was hoping that once back from holiday things would be different but they arent.
Just been to see respiratory nurse and she was fab, she could tell  i was fed with it all and has given me some advice, the most important thing is that i need my brompton appointment brought forward, so next week i am going to get on to it.
I have to go back to work next week and i am honestly dreading it!! i just hope i feel a bit better otherwise it is going to be really hard work, i am not sure how much longer i want or can work 36 hours a week (it frustrates me as i used to work 50 hours a week no problems.

Well hopefully this is just a bit of feeling down post holiday and i will pick myself up over the weekend!!